a great source of light

destined to cast

a shadow

in the shape of a

cross

(24/12/99)

a day of peace
not born of silence or isolation
but presence and hope
and the expectation of good

I wish for you
the awareness of blessing
and the awakening of dreams
the fulfilling of Gods image in you:
germination of passion and prose
in the moments no-one else knows
and from hours born of minutes these new memories
will grow to be cherished, never forgotten

and I pray at the end of a day
you rest in thankfulness and wonder
with anticipation of another:
This gift of God, given again.

I wish for you
this day

(c) Kent Langdon 2003

I am accepted…

John 1:12   I am God’s child.
John 15:15   As a disciple, I am a friend of Jesus Christ. 
Romans 5:1   I have been justified.
1 Corinthians 6:17   I am united with the Lord, and I am one with Him in spirit.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20   I have been bought with a price and I belong to God.
1 Corinthians 12:27   I am a member of Christ’s body.
Ephesians 1:3-8   I have been chosen by God and adopted as His child.
Colossians 1:13-14   I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins.
Colossians 2:9-10   I am complete in Christ.
Hebrews 4:14-16   I have direct access to the throne of grace through Jesus Christ.

I am secure…

Romans 8:1-2   I am free from condemnation.
Romans 8:28   I am assured that God works for my good in all circumstances.
Romans 8:31-39   I am free from any condemnation brought against me and I cannot be separated from the love of God.
2 Corinthians 1:21-22   I have been established, anointed and sealed by God.
Colossians 3:1-4   I am hidden with Christ in God.
Philippians 1:6   I am confident that God will complete the good work He started in me.
Philippians 3:20   I am a citizen of heaven.
2 Timothy 1:7   I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind.
1 John 5:18   I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me.

I am significant…

John 15:5   I am a branch of Jesus Christ, the true vine, and a channel of His life.
John 15:16   I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit.
1 Corinthians 3:16   I am God’s temple.
2 Corinthians 5:17-21   I am a minister of reconciliation for God.
Ephesians 2:6   I am seated with Jesus Christ in the heavenly realm.
Ephesians 2:10   I am God’s workmanship.
Ephesians 3:12   I may approach God with freedom and confidence.
Philippians 4:13   I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.

 
This list was shamelessly pinched from Freedom in Christ Ministries. (Credit where credit’s due!)

I’ve had a print of this list folded into my old NIV for years.
It’s true, you know – the truth will set you free…

Anyway. The phrase flipped my lid a little. It beached my whale, as it were. It got me thinking (is what I’m really trying to say)…

Being someone who loves words, who enjoys writing…I have a few phrases which I hang on to, some of which sum-up who I want to be. One of them is a line from a poem I wrote a number of years ago after hearing a bloke called Barry Kissell teaching on the prophetic nature of God and associated ‘ministry’. The ‘she’ in the poem was, of course, a real person, but the line has grown to mean so much more about my life, my hopes, my proximity to God and his will, and the ‘she’ has really become anyone who might be within ear-shot!

I was only standing close enough, that when I listened, she could hear Your voice.

If your life, either right now, or as you want it to be, could be summed up in one sentence, what would that sentence be?

Feel free to add a comment and let us know…

In his first public statement since being baptised and anointed for ministry; His first ‘quote’ while speaking in the public eye was this (Luke 4:18):

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised…

He came to heal the broken hearted, deliver those who are captive, bring sight where there is blindness, and make free those that are bruised…

That sounds like a divorce recovery program like no other!

In our desire to define the theology, let’s not forget that our loving Father sent His Son to this world with the desire (and ability) to heal our broken hearts.

When I think back, I know one of the most significant times (ever) that God chose to speak to me (through someone who was willing to listen to Him on my behalf) was the night before my wedding anniversary – the first wedding anniversary after being separated. So, in the darkest place, really. And God’s timing was perfect…

He used the words of this person encourage me to grieve, but more than that, to grieve and ‘walk on’, not stay in this dark place. He said he would ‘inject light’ into the dark room I was waiting in, He would pour water onto the dry ground, and He would lead me toward healing. I was reminded to stop and listen to God, always. To take time and space with Him, and not to try to do all of this on my own. And most of all, to remind me just how much God loves me.

They’re not unusual metaphors, but they’re very real encouragements. We do often sit for too long in a dark room, and we need someone to open the door for us. Lift the blinds and let in the light.

I’ve never really thought much about the phrase ‘blinds’ but it’s interesting isn’t it – the covers we use to keep out the light are called ‘blinds’. We think it’s safer in the dark, but really, we’re just avoiding the light. The light might reveal, which is hard, but there is grace. A lot of it! And we will heal. It’s only when we can honestly face our situation and let Gods light, and love and grace, shine on it, that we can begin to walk toward healing. And walk past that healing into the new life He offers us.

…Naked flame, she stands with a naked flame
I stand with the sons of Cain
Burned by the fire of love
Burned by the fire of love.

(Sleep comes like a drug in God’s country
Sad eyes, crooked crosses, in God’s country)

from In God’s Country/The Joshua Tree (C) U2.

I was just watching Rattle and Hum on DVD while having a look at the blog, and there was something about that line ‘I stand with the sons of Cain, burned by the fire of love’ that got my attention.

Typically of all U2′s lyrics, you could go a number of ways with it – you were burned, and hurt, by the ‘love’ of a fallen world, or you were simply a fallen son of Cain, but burned by some greater love…

Back in the mid-eighties when I first heard The Joshua Tree, and was caught up in its magic, its passion, its grit and its grace… I really had no idea about some of the grit and grace that would follow in the 90′s, both in my life, and in the music of my new favourite band.

One of the things that I loved so much about U2 was that they seemed to encapsulate a real-life faith. They were Christians who were musicians, but they didn’t wear their faith like a cheesy badge or tye-dyed t-shirt. Their faith was a part of who they were and what they did; what they did poorly, and what they did well. There was something ‘real’ about that. That grit and grace brought an authenticity to a faith that can so often be, for some, just words on a page.

I’ve always wanted my faith to find its place in my ‘real world’, not just my Sundays or the meetings where I celebrate and learn about my God. I want to know God is with me on a cold, wet week-day morning. It was really only when going through divorce that I realised He was walking with me, closer than I realised, through all those dark, depressing Mondays…

Yes, I stand with the sons of Cain, burned by the fire of love.

But I stand, too, with the Son of Adam – washed in the daily waters of grace.

I remember thinking to myself that I might not be ‘acceptable’ by a future partner’s parents, or even ‘lovable’ by ‘her’; the new girlfriend I was hoping would come into my life. The ‘parents thing’ was quite interesting in that I really valued highly my Christian faith, and as such, I thought it would be great if she came from a strong Christian family. And of course I would want their approval and blessing on our relationship. Following that thought would come the whisper ‘If they are so ‘good’, what if you’re not good enough for them?’

In a world based on judgement that might be a real fear, but in a world based on grace, as our life should be, then a whisper like that can simply be discarded as a lie. A lie that says you have to earn love, and that your sins stay with you. Jesus came to give us life, grace, and freedom to live unhindered by the shackles of our past mistakes.

Fast forward a few years – I am now very happily married with a lovely week-old baby boy. It’s a remarkable, challenging time, but I have also never loved or felt love like I have this week. I’m not sure why that is, some kind of mystery. But it’s a beautiful mystery. I have married the most amazing Christian lady with the most lovely Christian family. And not a perfect family either, but faithful, loving, hardworking and understanding.

My wife Sara was watching me set-up the Facebook group the other night and just started to cry; she looked at me with so much love through those teary eyes as she was overcome with compassion and perhaps a fresh revelation of the level of pain that my divorce had caused me. But you know, that moment was a revelation to me of the restoration, the spectacular restoration of my life and the gift of my new marriage.

God is so good. It may have taken me 5 long years on my own before I met Sara, and another 2 years before we married – but God’s timing is perfect and all his ways are just. His love is ever present and his plans for us are good.

Don’t be afraid of the future. God will bring people into your life who will show you His grace, and share with you His love.  Expect good things to come from your perfect Father…

And I did get that ‘approval’ – Sara’s parents gave me their blessing for marriage just four years ago last week, on a blue couch in a little house by the sea. It would only be a week later that Sara said her special ‘yes’ to me.

Never be afraid of waiting for the goodness of God. Believe me, it’s worth the wait.

I’ve just finished helping with another ‘Divorce & Seperation Recovery’ course at Holy Trinity Brompton. It’s about the only course out there at the moment which is aligned with (though not exclusive to) the Christian life… and was inspired to start this group up tonight. I’m hoping it will grow into something helpful, or hopeful for Christians out there who are going through this very dark, difficult stage in life.

re:place

HTB’s Divorce & Separation Recovery Course

you are the beautiful hour
that passed when I was dreaming
you are the second thought
the faded image
when I look back
at this unjoining

you are the passion that’s left
when the conflict’s resolved
you are the question that’s asked
when the certainty
dissolves

you are the words that slip off the trip of my tongue
when the tangible loses sight of senses that come
and in the reflection
and the shadow of love
I thirst for your light when the darkness is done
It’s the dense fog that rests
on the uncertain heart
this knot is truly untying
I am adrift
on this unjoining

18 October 2002