Don’t be afraid of the future

That sounds a bit dramatic, but I think it’s a very real fear. The unknown reactions of people in your unknown future…

I remember thinking to myself that I might not be ‘acceptable’ by a future partner’s parents, or even ‘lovable’ by ‘her’; the new girlfriend I was hoping would come into my life. The ‘parents thing’ was quite interesting in that I really valued highly my Christian faith, and as such, I thought it would be great if she came from a strong Christian family. And of course I would want their approval and blessing on our relationship. Following that thought would come the whisper ‘If they are so ‘good’, what if you’re not good enough for them?’

In a world based on judgement that might be a real fear, but in a world based on grace, as our life should be, then a whisper like that can simply be discarded as a lie. A lie that says you have to earn love, and that your sins stay with you. Jesus came to give us life, grace, and freedom to live unhindered by the shackles of our past mistakes.

Fast forward a few years – I am now very happily married with a lovely week-old baby boy. It’s a remarkable, challenging time, but I have also never loved or felt love like I have this week. I’m not sure why that is, some kind of mystery. But it’s a beautiful mystery. I have married the most amazing Christian lady with the most lovely Christian family. And not a perfect family either, but faithful, loving, hardworking and understanding.

My wife Sara was watching me set-up the Facebook group the other night and just started to cry; she looked at me with so much love through those teary eyes as she was overcome with compassion and perhaps a fresh revelation of the level of pain that my divorce had caused me. But you know, that moment was a revelation to me of the restoration, the spectacular restoration of my life and the gift of my new marriage.

God is so good. It may have taken me 5 long years on my own before I met Sara, and another 2 years before we married – but God’s timing is perfect and all his ways are just. His love is ever present and his plans for us are good.

Don’t be afraid of the future. God will bring people into your life who will show you His grace, and share with you His love.  Expect good things to come from your perfect Father…

And I did get that ‘approval’ – Sara’s parents gave me their blessing for marriage just four years ago last week, on a blue couch in a little house by the sea. It would only be a week later that Sara said her special ‘yes’ to me.

Never be afraid of waiting for the goodness of God. Believe me, it’s worth the wait.

Men and rust

yes
there are footprints in the sand
secret words written in dust
and objects stolen by men and rust
there are paths to walk
and light a few steps ahead
sometimes

everyone who is walking
runs the risk of tripping
falling
and falling
always
hurts
and those who are running the race
(with Jesus beside)
will fall harder
we all
trip
sometimes

for some every step in the sand
runs the risk of pain from man
and the secret words scream the truth
and truth hurts
sometimes

feelings stolen by men and rust
from tears which fall and corrode our trust
paths turn corners, bends are blind
and the crossroads come at the difficult times
but always a few steps ahead buried in the words you said
is the truth the light will come
the pain will
lift
the memories of falling will
drift
with
yesterday

the sun will sleep and you will come
and with me
weep

with me
stand
take my hand
when weeping is
done
we will walk
both
one.

6/12/98